Resurrection: The Wizard is back

“It was horrible!” a witness told our reporter at the place of the incident. “We thought we were safe now, after the trial and so on. And now that! How should we feel safe now, knowing that this monster runs free again?”

On Friday, after three years of menace, a anonymous citizen of our community gave theĀ  vital information where to find that foe commonly known as “Report Design Wizard” and even risked his life by assisting in arresting that dangerous person. Our governor, in an attempt to appease the upset masses, ordered a swift trial and (after a swiftly organized popular vote), sentenced the “Report-Design-Wizard” to death and commanded his execution at the very same day.

Officials in cooperation with the governor’s private physician confirmed the death of the Wizard at 3:46 PM. The dead body was buried in a near by cave. “It is a victorious day for all of us.” governor Pilatus said. “Our society must stand firm against all threats from inside and outside of our community. This event, once more shows that vigilant citizens help all of us.” Pilatus continued.

As the whole community was about to celebrate the death of the Wizard, no one was nearby to prevent the upcoming disaster. The escape of the resurrected Wizard might not have been noticed, if not a local group of concerned women were about to properly seal the cave. Apparently, they came to late.

At the site of the incident, local authorities currently secure the remains of what seems to be the major parts of the Wizards body. “It is nothing but a horrible mess in there.” officer Longinus said. “The whole place is filled with torn SWT code and obsolete Castor-XML-models. Whatever happened in there, it definitely did hurt a lot. The Wizard’s core seems to be missing, and according to the traces, something living has escaped from there.”

Local religious authorities currently try to calm down the fearful citizens. “We cannot know whether the resurrected wizard will pose the same threat as the old one. Resurrection on this scale does not happen a lot these days anymore.” a undisclosed source among the senior priests told us. “We simply cant tell how this divine event changed the Wizard’s mind. It is very likely that the new wizard is still very unstable and not fully formed. We all should be very careful when interacting with him for the next weeks.”

Historical sources seem to indicate, that resurrections like this have a great chance to transform even the worst of the communities enemy into a formidable and valuable citizen, who plays a important role in the integration of the disparate parts of the building blocks of our community.

Officer Longinus is convinced: “However the outcome of this story might be, it will be something worth to remember.”


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About Thomas

After working as all-hands guy and lead developer on Pentaho Reporting for over an decade, I have learned a thing or two about report generation, layouting and general BI practices. I have witnessed the remarkable growth of Pentaho Reporting from a small niche product to a enterprise class Business Intelligence product. This blog documents my own perspective on Pentaho Reporting's development process and our our steps towards upcoming releases.